How to be a Mom (and still be a Virgo)

Inspired by the thoughts & ramblings of myself and fellow Virgo #rebelmama Nikita (follow @ooh_nikita)

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Wear dark shades to the playground in case of sudden unwelcome eye contact.

Continue to place the same level of importance on style, beauty and general maintenance. Virgo mamas wouldn’t be caught DEAD in a Britney getup of sweatpants and zit cream.

When your baby naps, you meditate. And by meditate I mean clean.

Use play dates to brainstorm and strategize. When the kids play, bonus.

Join various mom groups on facebook and proceed to roll your eyes at almost everything.

Be your moody self where it really matters. “I can’t deal with socializing you today my child. Let’s go sit on a patio by ourselves and observe. I’ll have the pinot noir”.

Organize everything, including diapers, with aesthetic in mind. (Packaging is lazy).

Prepare your home to be photo shoot ready every time someone comes over to visit the babe. This includes  fancy scented candles. (Cheapo ones only enhance the diaper genie experience).

When you’re lazy, be NEXT LEVEL lazy and lay lifelessly on the play mat all day calling your kid back. We work best in extremes.

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Make lists like it’s a national sport. And if it’s a grocery list, organize by store layout. (Produce first.)

Take your baby’s clothes off at mealtime. The best stains are the ones that never happened.

Put children’s books away by size. Common sense.

Make cleaning a fun game. (Disclaimer: leaving your toddler with a lint roller and a cat may result in unwarranted scraps)

Have your baby’s wardrobe follow society rules. We don’t do public places in our PJ onesie. There’s a time and place for everything.

Get back to the grind as soon as mat leave is up.. and add some personal projects too. A busy mommy is a mommy less likely to hang out on Pinterest all day.

Don’t lose your cool. Chilling the f*ck out is the best ingredient to a successful day with bebe.

We cherish our lifestyle and don’t abandon it after childbirth. Standard Hotel first, Disney all-inclusive cruise NEVER.

Lastly, be sure to link up with at least one fellow Virgo mama so you can trade obsessive compulsive details of every day mama life and strive to reach the impossible: Perfection. Dammit, we’ll come close.

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Featured Image via Beyonce 

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One Comment Add yours

  1. oohnikita says:

    I cannot tell you how happy I am that we randomly ended up procreating at the same time 🙏 #rebelmamasunite #virgomamasunite

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